3.14.13

On March 14th I listened to The Lemonheads It’s A Shame About Ray, Spiritualized Lazer Guided Melodies, and The Cribs Payola. I will try and be brief. 

I believe everyone is capable of a moment of pure brilliance. This is Evan Dando’s shining moment in the sun and it pisses me off that all most people heard from this album was the cover of “Mrs. Robinson.” And it was basically a lousy bonus track!

I went to see Dando play this album in its entirety last year, but I missed the first three songs because I was drinking a beer across the street! I was pissed about that, but it was a really big mug of Hofbräuhaus and I wasn't gonna chug it!

Every song on It's A Shame About Ray is short, sweet and perfect. It's a Pop Rock masterpiece and songs don't waste a second getting to their point. If you got nothing to do for half an hour listen to this record! Skip an episode of Seinfeld you've seen 800 time and listen to this instead!

Wanna hear a lame story? 

One time in the late 90's I was trying to score pot with a lady friend of mine and it was proving to be futile. This was that era, at least in Buffalo, NY, where Mexican brick weed ruled the roost but you could get the real tasty shit if you worked for it. Sure, we could have cruised down to the Pot Nazi's for a bag of sticks and seeds, but we wanted to put in the effort. (He was dubbed the Pot Nazi because he literally was a Nazi. There was a swastika painted on his living room wall. And I bought weed from this guy! What does that say about me?) 

Regardless of that moral dilemma, my lady friend and I made several phone calls to no avail. But, then I remembered some guy I used to work who was always bragging about having the good stuff. On a hunch, we headed over to his favorite watering hole. As luck would have it he was there and he was holding! Sadly, he wanted a hundo for an eighth! I politely told him to fuck off and we got outta the place. We followed several other dead ends with no score in sight.

Thirty minutes later I was pulling stems and seeds out of a bag of Nazi pot, backing a bowl and assuring myself that all drug dealers are bad no matter what their socio or political beliefs may be. As we pulled into my driveway "My Drug Buddy" came on the mix tape in my cassette player. My lady friend and I laughed and laughed about the parallels of the song's lyrics and the evening we just shared. When the laughter subsided I felt an alignment in the stars and thought now was the time to make a move. I swooped in for a kiss and her head nearly broke the passenger side window trying to get away from my puckered lips. "I think I'm gonna get going," she said as she rubbed her head and skedaddled. Good times.

I have a weird relationship with Spiritualized. I've seen them at least twice, I don’t really “own” any of their albums, and every once in a while I’ll hear something from J. Spaceman and company and say, “oh this is Spiritualized? I gotta listen to this.” I do and then they’re gone from my life for a while.

I’m way too stupid to accurately write up a record like this, so here’s what a professional writer from Melody Maker with nothing to do except to be more creative than what he’s listening to had to say, “Spiritualized's music quivers with Apollonian attributes - airiness, fleetness, radiance, serenity... exhilaration of cutting loose, of goalless propulsion.” I was just gonna say that I think it's neato!

I’m not exactly sure what Apollonian attributes are, but Lazer Guided Melodies definitely has ‘em.

The album loses me in the second half though. I guess it’s where the “goalless propulsion” kicks in and I drop out. Love you, Spaceman!

I didn't really know this was a “Best Of” from The Cribs. But I only know one of their songs, so what better way to get to know the “hits!”

What had happened was this... I got their debut in 2004, really liked “You Were Always The One,” and not much else, but thought, “I’ll keep an out for these guys.” 

They put out four records since the debut, and I never really heard from them again. Bad looking, I guess. Although I thought “Man’s Needs” sounds familiar. I definitely heard that before,  but I don't think I knew it was The Cribs, or I had forgot I was supposed to be on the lookout for their music. I dunno, maybe?

I listened to this whole thing. I didn't love it. I didn't hate it. It was a toe tapping good time. I dubbed it Brit Doofus Rock and now I’m going to move on with my life. I’ll keep an eye out for these guys in the future.

They do a cover of “Bastards Of Young,” and if you’re a friend of The Replacements, you’re a friend of mine! 

Tomorrow I will listen to World Party Goodbye Jumbo, The Afghan Whigs Gentlemen, and Foals Holy Fire. 

Here's the entire March Playlist!