I was reading an article on Yahoo the other day about New York City’s Super Mayor, Mikey Bloomberg and something in it compelled me to write an Arizona state senator.
The article detailed Bloomberg’s personal initiative to send undercover secret agents to out of state gun shows to purchase guns.
Recently, Hizzoner spent six figures to have these secret agents pull a little sting operation in the great state of Arizona! You know the state that doesn’t acknowledge Martin Luther King Day, daylight savings time or the Jewish religion. The sting worked and the guys were able to waltz into a gun show, tell a vendor they “probably wouldn’t pass a background check,” and walk out with 9mm bazookas.
I’m thinking, “Good for you Bloomy! Fuck those guys! I’m sick of reading about how 85-90% of illegal guns found on New York City streets are from out of state! Mike Bloomberg is a pro-mother-fucking-active mother fucker… Do I want a green tea… Should I get a roast beef sandwich for lunch… I’m pretty sure Rothlessburger (SIC) didn’t rape anybody proper, but he’s a scumbag.” My mind started wandering there, because I was reading an article about gun control.
But then it happened! Some shitkicker named Ronald Gould gets quoted in the article and then I started thinking to myself, “what a dick!”
Gould’s one of those good ol’ boy GOP scumbags that would like to shoot Mexicans with concealed weapons and catapult their corpses back to Mexico. I’m assuming.
Senator Gould recently introduced Senate Bill 1201, which would require college campuses to allow people to carry concealed weapons. Cause if there’s one place you want idealistic, impressionable, young assholes running around with concealed guns, it’s on a fucking college campus! He introduced that bill just weeks after Gabrielle Giffords’ assassination attempt and the mass killing of six people. He also supports legislation that denies citizenship to children born in this country. And he passed a bill that added a 20% sales tax on mustache rides, in effect making them now 7 cents and not a nickel! Basically, if you filled this guy with vinegar and attached a nozzle, you’re mom would... well you get the point.
After I read the article he was quoted in, I wrote him the following missive…
SUBJECT: You And I, Are Very Different People
Dear Mr. Gould,
Let me start off by saying that your mustache and haircut are wonderful. You look like you've pulled over a few cars on the state highway in your time, or have closed down the Manhole on several occasions. Either way, it’s a tried and true look adored by men and women everywhere.
Regardless, I'm writing you today, because I just read a comment of yours in an article I saw on Yahoo, and it made me say out loud, "What a dick!"
After learning that the great Mayor of New York City, Michael Bloomberg, had authorized a sting operation in your state, in which 9mm handguns were sold to guys saying they wouldn't pass a background check, you said, "Let me get this straight: From New York City, they are going to send people to Arizona to look into this? They might take a look a little closer to home if they are concerned about guns getting in their state."
That was your gut reaction? Maybe first you said, "Shit in my hat, that ain't right!" Or, "Golly! Thanks Mr. Bloomberg, because even though I support an American's right to bare arms, I am concerned about guns falling into the wrong hands!" Tell me that was your initial reaction and it didn't make the article I read. If so, please read no further, but if not read on.
Allow me to spout off a fact, I just Googled. In 2009, 5,000 illegal firearms were found in New York City. Eighty five percent of them were from out of state. Which states? I dunno. (In the article I read, in 2010, 90% of the guns were from out of state.)
Can I offer a suggestion to you sir? Instead of jumping on the GOP soapbox and spouting off some how-dare-they rhetoric and acting like any one of the cast members of a Real Housewives show, you should really take a look at what happened in your backyard!
In your state, guns were sold at a gun show (I’m sure you’ve taken a lot of ladies to the gun show. Am I right?) to people that shouldn't have been able to buy guns. End of the gosh darn story. Adolf Hitler, or even worse Julian Assange could have organized this sting and your reaction should have been, "THANK YOU!!"
But NO! You had to say some dumb shit and now here I am writing you a letter!
Can I get serious here for a second? I know a young lady named Rachel that works at a store right across the street from where Jared Loughner killed six people. I worry for her and everyone else in your state, if guns can just be bought by anybody. I live in New York City, along with almost everyone I love and I worry for us. God forbid someday someone I know is gunned down by a person that purchased a weapon at a gun show in a state with an asshole like you in office.
GFY,
Brad Maybe!
